Mom confession and Calla lillies.

 

I have to make a confession. I am so proud of my son’s accomplishments. Him, being on the spectrum, can mean that learning can be a bit harder in some areas. But he is thriving, and that makes me so happy. He is a good kid in school, lots of the littles like him enough. So, why can I not shut the lady of fear up that makes me worry constantly about bullying?

Let me set the stage, in a sort of Sophia Petrillo from Golden Girls kind of way.

via GIPHY

Picture it,1993 or was it 1994? Anyways, a little girl was in elementary school. And she was picked on, a lot by a group of mean girls. The girls would push her up and down concrete stairs. The girls would get the other boys in class to be mean to her. They would take knit hats and put them over her whole head making it impossible to breathe. All falling under the teacher’s blind eye. She would just turn away, and then pick on the girl as well. Then when the little girl told adults what would happen, the bullying would get worse, much worse. And she was terrified of going to school. Bullying happened off and on even through Jr High. When girls she thought were her friends one day decided to be awful. They called her and had her crush on the other line without her knowing(or so they said. don’t recall if they really did or not). And made a fool of her, they kept calling and kept harassing the girl. Threatened her constantly and made fun of her best friend who didnt even go to that school. And tried to turn people against her. Luckily people saw through it or mostly saw through it. It was hell for the girl and some of it or most of it she didnt tell her parents. OR for the phone calls they were not home but the girl knew from past experience that it would make matters worse. And so the girl suffered from anxiety, stopped eating well while at school, and got sick a lot. High school wasn’t much better.

Guys the girl in this story, was me. I was relentlessly bullied in school.

As a mom of a child with special needs I constantly worry about him having similar problems. The thing is a lot of kids who have disabilities have a higher chance of these occurrences. I fear for him, I worry. Those experiences stuck with me, those demented life experiences were terrible. And they really can screw a person up. All I can do is reassure him and keep explaining what it is.

It worries me, I do not want him to go through what I went through. And I kept it hidden, from true friends and from my parents. I kept it hidden from the teachers and administrators, because of experience where things got way worse. I do not want my son to go through that, and part of me is worried he wont understand he is being bullied. Words hurt, but the bullying I endured was also physical on numerous occasions.

I know I am not the only parent that worries about this. I know that. And I just hope that we as parents can teach understanding and that if our kids bully we will as their parents retaliate and make them make it right. I know I will if my son was the bully. I take that pledge! Because a lot of it starts at home.

So now on to the outfit. This dress, is oldish. I got it from the collaboration Victoria Beckham did with Target. I went crazy with it, unfortunately some things were out of stock. But I got the Calla Lilly pants and dress and the bunny dress. I just wish that there was a boy’s line to compliment the ladies.

I decided to wear it with my fave color of the season, GREEN. This bright green Michael Kors bag goes perfectly with the dress and being lazy as hell, I wore the most prominent shoe on the blog at the moment, the blinged out sandal slide.

#sorrynotsorryDress: Victoria Beckham for target I love this dress here that is similar in style

Shoes: Target similar

Bag: Michael Kors similar

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10 Comments

  • Simplement Lui May 30, 2018 at 3:18 AM

    How sad to read it was such a nightmare at school for you! As parent we do worry for our kids you are so right … one of my daughter had the same kind of situation and when the school director tried to minimize facts then I stopped being diplomatic … now it’s much better … but as parent … I’d say never let down … never let those situations getting worse!

    Reply
    • Stephanie May 30, 2018 at 8:48 AM

      Thank you, sorry your child had problems. IT is sad when the administration makes matters worse. My sons school knows better than to mess with my son, I become the Khalesi and tear them down. We can not let down you are right!

      Reply
  • Gabrielle May 30, 2018 at 10:23 AM

    I’m so sorry to hear school was so difficult for you Stephanie, I also really didn’t enjoy that time of life. How lovely your little one is thriving though!! 🙂

    aglassofice.com x

    Reply
    • Stephanie June 3, 2018 at 6:19 PM

      Thank you. It was rough

      Reply
  • Glogeworld May 31, 2018 at 1:40 AM

    Hey Steph, I just want to let you know that you’re a strong woman and a great mother. Believe me your son will grow up and will appreciate your awesomeness in his life. This post got my eyes wet. Thank you for sharing this experience and I love your dress.

    Reply
    • Stephanie June 3, 2018 at 6:19 PM

      Thank you so much. I hope so

      Reply
  • Laura May 31, 2018 at 7:52 PM

    I am so sorry to hear of the trouble you went through in school. Working in the schools I know there are so many more things in place to prevent bullying than when we went to school. I hope for both of your sakes that he has a wonderful school experience!

    Reply
    • Stephanie June 3, 2018 at 6:21 PM

      It was something that I can never forget. Kids dont forget that kind of torment. Ever. I know my son’s school has a lot in place to help them. But parents also need to be aware and also held accountable. I would hope that if mom y son bullied another they would hold me accountable for what he does.

      Reply
  • Emma Peach June 17, 2018 at 6:34 PM

    I’m so sorry to hear about the horrible time you had at school. I went to quite a rough high school and there was a lot of bullying, I hated it. Bullying is hideous and should never be tolerated by schools. I was bullied by a teacher in infant school and it made my life a misery. It has made me more protective of my daughter – I take no shit from teachers if I think she’s been treated unfairly! On a lighter note, I love your lily print dress and bright green bag. Thank you for linking up!

    Emma xxx

    Reply
    • Stephanie June 19, 2018 at 7:12 AM

      thank you.sorry that you had it rough too. bullying is horrible

      Reply

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